NLP/EQ tip #11:

How to do things better - the 'New Behaviour Generator'


Applications: this is a great NLP technique for being able to do something better, or finding new ways to handle challenging situations. It's like positive mental rehearsal on steroids!

NB. If you are already an NLP practitioner and you covered this on your practitioner training, compare this version of the process with the one you know. I've simplified it to its essentials!

1. Describe a behaviour you would like to be able to do, or how you would like to be able to do something better. Start from a belief and internal dialogue of 'I can do this'.

2. Create a mental 'movie' in which you see yourself doing the new behaviour the way you want. Make sure the picture is big, bright and vivid. Add sound so that you see and hear yourself. Adjust the movie until you are satisfied with the new behaviour. (Extra tip: for most people, looking up and to your right as you do this will help. For a few people - usually if you're left-handed - looking up and to your left will work better.)

3. Step into the 'movie' and check how this feels. Make any further adjustments you need to until you feel the way you want. (Extra tip: for most people, looking down towards your dominant hand will help you get in touch with what you are feeling).

4. Imagine seeing yourself use the new behaviour in 3 or more opportunities in the future to generalise the new ability out. Again, looking up will help you to visualise.


Some extra refinements:

A) Use a role model: In steps 2 and 3 you can use a 'role model' who you know can do the desired behaviour well. Run a movie of that person performing the behaviour (Step 2) and then 'become' that person in Step 3. Then repeat Steps 2 and 3 with yourself in the movie, making any changes you need to.

B) Use resources from your past: if you have dealt with similar situations well in the past, see yourself doing that and then transfer that skill into the new situation.

C) 'Chunk' the behaviour down: if you need to, break the desired behaviour down into smaller steps and run through Steps 2 and 3 on each.

D) Use a timeline: lay a timeline out on the floor, from past to future. See yourself enjoying the results of the desired behaviour and place this goal on the timeline. Step into it, get the good feelings, and notice the steps and any new behaviours associated with them leading up to the successful achievement of this goal.

Step off the timeline and notice where each new behaviour step is on the timeline. Repeat Steps 2 and 3 for each new behaviour. Finally walk up the timeline from now, associating into each step, until you reach your goal. Store your goal and the new behaviours associated with it wherever feels right for you.

E) Create alternatives: at Step 2 ask your unconscious mind to create at least 3 options for new behaviours. Try out each and select the most appropriate.


Let me know how you get on!



To learn and get fluent with more life-changing exercises like this - to help yourself and others - consider taking an NLP Practitioner Training.

If you can't get to a live training yet, do the next best thing - study these superb NLP Skills Builder DVD sets by top US NLP trainer Jonathan Altfeld!


Return to the NLP/EQ tips archive

Get More NLP/EQ Tips Free in the 'UpDATE' Newsletter

Practical tips from NLP, emotional intelligence and coaching that you can use straight away to enhance your business and personal life!

cover of "Six Best Business NLP Books" by Andy Smith

Sign up for the Coaching Leaders Update newsletter now and we'll send you this free 6-page report on "The Six Best NLP Books for Business" by NLP trainer and emotional intelligence coach Andy Smith.

Train in NLP

NLP Practitioner Training to develop emotional intelligence and coaching skills. Full details and prices here.

We can also put together a bespoke training course in NLP for your organisation.

Other NLP courses and seminars - Foundation Skills and Master Practitioner



The rest of the site

This is a place where you can find information and practical resources to develop Emotional Intelligence (also called "EI" or "EQ") using NLP and other disciplines.

Find out why NLP provides the practical "toolkit" for improving your EQ - and start using this knowledge immediately with our free tips. You can also order books, CDs and audio downloads and invest in our courses in NLP and coaching.


Emotional Intelligence

Since the mid-90's, emotional intelligence has been increasingly recognised as essential to success in business, relationships, and life in general. Here's the information you need... (Find out more)


NLP (and how it relates to emotional intelligence)

NLP is a way of modelling how successful people achieve their results. It gives us a wonderful set of techniques and principles for enhancing the five 'competencies' of Emotional Intelligence: self-awareness, self-control, motivation, empathy, and social skills... (Find out more)

Training and Seminars

Build the practical skills to help yourself and others with our affordable courses in NLP and coaching. We also do bespoke training and coaching for businesses. Small groups, great trainers, life-changing experiences... (Find out more)


Resource Centre

The best books on EQ, NLP, personal development and coaching, reviewed and available for you to buy. We also have selected DVD and CD programmes that you can order... (Visit the Resource Centre)



© Coaching Leaders Ltd 2006